Picking a good band name isn’t easy. As long as band names have existed, there have been good and bad ones. For every Grateful Dead, which is a good band name, you also have a Herman’s Hermits, which is a bad band name. So what exactly makes one great and one crummy? …WE DON’T KNOW, MAN!

There’s no science to it, it’s just the way it is! To paraphrase Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart on the subject of defining whether something is art or pornography, “I just know it when I see it.”

That’s pretty much the extent of how we go about judging the merits of a band’s name. If ever there’s a time of year in Austin when we get a hearty influx of new bands with fantastic, unusual, and straight up shitty musical monikers, it is SXSW. Without further adieu, here are the Best and Worst Band names of SXSW 2017.

Planet Booty (Oakland, CA)
Can we PLEASE collectively agree to rename Earth, Planet Booty?